The Art of a {Good} Marriage

It’s not the giant gusts of wind that will push you off course …


just weak, cold, bitter currents of air, over time … the little things, the small seeds of bitterness, those icy winds that can change direction of your day to day life … they can be frigid, blowing, winter sharp-edged words or small, selfish actions ..



and so, I breathe, take a moment to put the kettle on the stove and listen for the whistle of the warmth as the dipping temperatures swirl the white snow around the outside world … these winds, they are numbing … they bite at the hands of the man who works so hard, care so deeply for his children …

… they sting at the soul that loves the Almighty , even if it means he will never read the looming stack of parenting books piled high on the bedside table … or schedule as many date nights or getaways as a tired wife might feel required …



… still … I need to light a candle of warmth,  ensure that inside these four walls where we call ‘home ‘ there is a haven, a safe place, a resting spot from the frigid world… a world that can be a dark, dreary place which will pull on the weathered strings that tie a marriage together …


…. if those strings unravel from this penetrating wind, there is not much left to hold a union of love together …“in the art of marriage, the little things are the big things.” 

and so, I constantly read over these words that hang on my sea-foam plaster dining room walls …


The Art of Marriage,
by Wilfred Peterson
A good marriage must be created.
In the art of marriage the little things are the big things…

It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say, “I love you” at least once each day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is in giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

…. rhyming words, framed, given to a love-struck young couple 10.5 years ago on their wedding day ….


and I am left to hold fast and buckle down, tie the strands tighter for I will not allow the icy winds of a desolate winter to pull apart, to weaken the Art of a tired, exhausted, but good Marriage.


and I remember that a marriage is not only the marrying of the right person …


… it is becoming the right person for the man you married.



[I’ve created this image for your own downloadable {The Art of Marriage} card. Print it. Put it up on your fridge. Stick it in your book as a bookmark. Let it be a a daily reminder that when it comes to the sacred marriage, the little things add up.]



January 22, 2013 - 9:48 am

Grandma Gerr Nice! x