Keeping Quiet When Required

{My blog was “hacked” recently so I apologize for the delay. I am grateful for the wonderful men who helped restore the blog. Please be patient as I go through it , slowly, and restore the details.}

The day was unraveling fast. I had gotten up later than I had hoped … and my devotion and quiet time was abruptly cut short by an early rising baby … breakfast was late … the three year old woke up cranky … halfway into my morning task of making an apple pie, I could feel myself feeling short and ill tempered.

I gathered the girls together around the piano after breakfast … we were to practice a few hymns that they will be singing at a small family recital in May. Flipping through our hymn book, I located our song of choice.

“Heaven Came Down”, I announced to the girls as they fidgeted and wiggled behind me. Someone poked somebody and another whined that her hair brush was still missing.

Today, I thought, we’ll try singing in harmony. 

 

“I’ll just play the lead and sing and the harmony loudly … you follow along after me,” I said, picturing the moment to be a blissful parenting moment of “aha! … NOW you can sing harmony whenever you wish!” It did not go as anticipated …

Trying to teach the older girls the art of alto proved to be more challenging. In fact, nothing seemed to be in harmony that morning.

” I can’t sing those notes,” one girl whined.

Sing louder, I instructed, tapping along the song, Heaven Came Down, on the keyboard. All I could hear was the three year old belting out the tune in my ear. At least she was singing loud enough to be heard. Still, complaints about the song were mumbled but no lovely singing angels were joining me in my choir attempts …

The song ended in frustration. It certainly did not feel like Heaven came down in that music room…
Things just got icky after that. Grumpy moods, short tempers, lazy characters were brooding in our home that morning.

Within a few hours, I could feel the frustration levels top off … I wanted to call my husband and cry or vent or explain …. I wanted him to help … {how?} or at least know challenging my day was going … and it was not even lunch time yet.

 

Something stopped me from calling him, though. I just couldn’t bring myself to pick up the phone and call him in the middle of his busy work day to complain.

 

A prayer of “Help!” was sent up to my Heavenly Father instead. A listen to a good, old fashioned sermon to get my attitude in check while I washed up the lunch dishes … a few breaths of fresh air outside in the April afternoon … it all helped.

 

I thank God I did not call my husband to complain … because deep in my heart, I knew he did not need to hear my woes and worries, even if they seemed monumental at the time. I know his day would not have been brighter and happier had I called and unloaded my troubles on him. Now, I am not saying you cannot call your husband or talk to him about your trials in your day, however I do feel there is this general mentality that women can just complain whenever they want.

I’m so busy. I’m so stressed. I can’t handle my life. My workload is wearing me down. My children are tiring. My job is too much. My life is too stressful. I’m so tired.

 

I hear this often – and sometimes it comes from my own mouth.

I am ashamed! Ladies, it’s time to pull up our socks, put a smile on our face a use the joy of the Lord as our strength.
Do our husbands need to always hear of our woes and trials by text, phone call or the minute they walk in the door? Let’s not forget … they, too, are tired. Perhaps from other trials in the day, but still they are weary.

Later that day, in our read aloud time, we read through a chapter of the Ingalls family … I noticed, in a certain situation where the family was frightened and somewhat stressed, unsure of what was to come around the next corner, Ma reacted with gentle wisdom.

“Ma looked at him astonished.
Her mouth opened and then it shut;
she did not say anything.”

-By the Shores of the Silver Lake

 

Oh, Lord, help me to be like this great wife in history!
I do not need to say everything that comes into my head. I do not need to dwell on the negative and feel sorry for myself!

No care is too small for Jesus, indeed. However, we need to be careful with our self-pity thoughts – remember: someone else is always having a worse day than you.  Do we REALLY have the right to whine? Find the joys in the day, look for the positive moments, change your mindset and avoid feeling like you cannot handle your life. God will give strength and renewed joy if you as – and if you choose to receive it!

 

Later that evening, when my husband came home, sore and tired, I greeted him at the back door. The children jumped around him like excited puppy dogs, asking him about his day and holding up their art projects for the day … I , too, greeted him and stood holding the hefty baby boy in my arms. I smiled as the man of the house slid his coat off and untied his heavy dress shoes.

“What? What are you smiling about?” he asked, suspiciously. ” What? What did you do?”

I smiled even brighter.

“Nothing,” I replied. “It’s what I didn’t do that makes me smile.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

April 17, 2018 - 10:45 pm

Monica I’m so glad your blog is back! And I do so relate to this post. I have complained to my husband many, many times some of which he even came home from work to take over or check on us. While I admit it was a great relief to me to have him come home, ashamedly I failed to first consult and rely on my Heavenly Father. Today I was needing to vent or rant about something and I was forming a text in my mind to a couple of my friends and the Lord helped me to see how I just needed to wait on it awhile. And “awhile” ended up being I never did text to rant or vent to them. Thank the Lord for giving us strength to be quiet. It sure keeps us from regret! He is so gracious!

April 17, 2018 - 4:20 pm

Gigi Thank you for your encouragement, Katy! It’s a slow progress in learning for me, as well… 🙂

April 17, 2018 - 1:08 pm

Katy Loved this! I love your honesty and how you point to Christ…always! 🙂 And you are *so* right…we don’t always need to open our mouths…this is a lesson I too am learning (albeit slowly!).

I’m sorry your blog got hacked! How awful! Your updated look is pretty though! 🙂

April 16, 2018 - 10:40 am

Betty Gauthier So glad you are back online. I was checking daily and was worried you had shut down and I wouldn’t be able to see all these lovely little people growing up. Welcome back, I missed you.
Aunt Betty

April 15, 2018 - 10:21 pm

Brenda Clair (Gigi’s Mom) Exactly!! Great advice Gillian!! It’s what we DON’T say that counts! xoxo

April 15, 2018 - 5:27 pm

Sue Gigi! I am so happy to see that you are still here! I loved today’s thoughts that you shared and it is exactly what i needed to hear also. As always, thanks for your honest, encouraging post!

April 13, 2018 - 6:00 pm

Our Home of Many Blessings This is exactly what I needed to hear today!Thanks for Sharing your thoughts.Somebody else does go through this to!!