Surely the righteous will never be shaken;
they will be remembered forever.
They will have no fear of bad news;
their hearts are steadfast,
trusting in the Lord.
Psalm 112:6,7
I truly would never want to live without God in control.
Just a little pregnancy update … last week started with some rather unexplainable bleeding, followed by a slow-moving tiny, baby and an ultrasound that picked up an irregular heart beat. From there, a little bed rest was thrown in, we were bounced around from hospital to hospital to the midwife clinic with ultrasounds and non-stress tests. {Should I mention that all five girls were and are still sick during this week? From problematic midnight nosebleeds to vomiting on our bed in the middle of the night to feverish foreheads and lethargic children … } Then un-expectantly, on a warm Sunday afternoon during the midwife’s home visit, we were told to pack a hospital bag and head to the local hospital where we would start labour … we searched out newborn sleepers and threw what I could remember was needed into a tiny pink suitcase and headed to the hospital. Kissing the girls good-bye and telling them they’d have a brother or sister soon, we jumped in our black Suburban and headed in the opposite direction of my plans for a home birth. It all seemed rather crazy. The baby was not in distress, but it was felt that perhaps it would be best to get ‘baby out’ due to size, unexplained bleeding and the heart arrhythmia that was recently discovered …
As it turns out, since the ultrasounds predicted the baby to be under 5 lbs., an induction would not be possible unless we moved to a higher level hospital, hours away from our home. After many conversations with the doctor and our midwife, knowing I have a history of having small but healthy babies (two babies were in the 4 lb. range, two were in the 5 lbs., and one was 6 lbs.) a lot of praying and talking it through together, we decided to wait, to go home and see where God leads this pregnancy. We really won’t know too much about the arrhythmia until the baby is born …
Just spending the past week with so many appointments and hospital visits and facing the fact that decisions needed to be made regarding the health of our unborn baby – all of this gave me a much bigger respect for those parents who have or are dealing with major issues in their pregnancy or relating to their children’s health. I’m grateful for a sense of peace over the last few days and knowledge that God is in control, despite what anyone says, what textbooks say or suggest or what medical ultrasounds may predict. We are not aiming to be foolish with our decisions but rather react in faith instead of fear.
We are excitedly awaiting to hold our little baby in our arms when God sees fit… it will be wonderful.
by Gigi
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